Posts tagged ‘drivel’

The Ringo Syndrome

The Ringo Syndrome: The psychological tendency to identify with, or be excessively fond of, the most paavam and over-looked character in a group, out of sheer cussedness. Symptoms include Beatles posters with John, Paul and George cut out of them, building altars to Bifur Bofur and Bombur, and Brahma worship. Complications that may arise from Ringo Syndrome may include an obsession with all drummers, a fervid fondness for Branwell Bronte, and a passion for the Thomas Covenant books. (Thomas Covenant is a Stephen Donaldson hero whose primary characteristic is the ability to whine “Leper! Outcast! Unclean!” and writhe in his own pathetic-ness whenever he is called upon to so something plot-related.)


Continue Reading July 1, 2010 at 10:55 am 4 comments


o bird so rare in feet and form,

o bird that shimmers off the ground.

o birdie fair! o birdie wise!

o birdie birdie, name your price.

May 25, 2010 at 9:48 am 3 comments

the boy in a can

oh who will remember the boy in a can?

his teeth are december, his nose a meringue.

his shoulders are slumped in the ease of defeat;

when you speak to him he huddles, trembly as a beet.

March 12, 2010 at 10:18 am 3 comments

one hos town; hampi

i’m sorry, but it’s true.

i know because i stayed in hospet for an entire week.

well five days, anyway.

and commuted faithfully to hampi every morning.

not that i have anything against hosses,

singular or plural. and i am fond even of macaques.

and langurs. and rock pigeons and hoopoes.

they are fine upstanding people – especially the langurs.

(how one manages to meet a langur and not find

that it is eerily similar to all one’s relatives

i do not know.)

hampi is where myth and history meet.

they smoke together.

noisily. redly.

they brawl and they collapse

and out of their nostrils flows such stuff as religions are made on.

rocks, rivers, and gods gods gods

rolling madly in the dust.

February 23, 2010 at 9:47 am 9 comments

at sea

girish swims sadly on and on

he dreams of a house, a car, and a lawn.

in his mind, as he mows

he contemplates toes.

February 12, 2010 at 5:30 pm 2 comments

oomby broomby

bandylegsi once met a creature tall and fierce,

its legs were bandy and its ears were worse.

it sat on a prickly shrub all day long

and all it did was sing this song:

oomby broomby ow! a thorn

coomby loomby so forlorn

“i’ll hold the shrub,” i offered to it,

“while you get off and rest a bit.”

but it wouldn’t speak, and shook its head

and sang another ditty from its poky bed.

roomby toomby bah! more spines

hoomby woomby i sobs and pines.

* in memory of one of the fiercest animals i have ever known, on her birthday. she was not, for the record, bandy-legged in the least.

November 3, 2009 at 12:01 pm Leave a comment

newness: in which I try my hand at honesty

First honest thing: I find wordpress a bit intimidating. I think it’s the sleekness. Blogger was sort of cheerful and goofy. It had low expectations and didn’t seem to mind whatever I said, even if it was awful. WordPress’s grey posting page has a steely, business-like look about it.


Honest thing number 2: I wanted to hate Brandon Sanderson with a deep and dreadful hatred for being the non-Robert- Jordan person to write the end of the Wheel of Time series. But really, in some very specific ways, I think Brandon Sanderson may just be a better writer than poor Robert Jordan. Not a better plotter, and not a better world-builder, and not even necessarily better with character (more on this in a minute), but in sheer ability to make the now huge and cumbersome plots actually move. Remember that thing called urgency that Robert Jordan decided to forgo way back about Book 8 or thereabouts in favour of more Sea Folk customs and more low-necked green dresses slashed with yellow? Brandon Sanderson is all jumpy with urgency. And I have to sort of cheer him on for it. He clearly wants to get to the Last Battle (hint to BS: maybe spreading it into three books isn’t the best way to accomplish this?) and start the big bloodshed that some of us have been anticipating for almost a decade.

Other Wheel of Time related, possibly less true things:

1. Poor poor newly-pointless Mat, who has been my favourite person in the books all along. Give him a plot someone. Even a tiny little battle would do.  And stop trying to write him like the Wheel of Time’s sub-par version of Tehol Beddict. He used to have his own personality, remember? Ditto Thom.

2. Egwene finally justifies her existence! *drumroll* Even if all her adversaries did seem to just crumble without her having to try too hard. Still. I liked the way her civil disobedience thing played out.

3. If Perrin and Faile don’t die in the last book I am going to be very very upset. They are stupid and whiny and turn plot-gold into straw without even trying.

4. I’m not yet done digesting the many and strange metamorphoses of Rand al’ Thor. I am suspending judgement until the last book.

5. I can finally say I like Nynaeve. She has always been one of those borderline good characters for me. Sometimes she was so sneaky and clever and yelled satisfyingly at characters I disliked. The rest of the time she sort of collapsed internally and based her entire self-esteem on ugly clothes and strange power games and blamed every single person for her own stupidity. And then Robert Jordan would have some random person yell “Brave-as-a-Lion Nynaeve” and expect me to ignore the evidence of the last 300 pages.

I am happy to finally have her sensible and efficient and doing actual things.

5. The entire Aviendha plot-line annoyed me. She always comes off looking interesting from other people’s points-of-view, but her own is a bit boring. This is true for many of Robert Jordan’s women – their actions are admirable, but he doesn’t seem able to correctly describe the internal processes that end up with them doing those actions. Which makes me think that perhaps Sanderson’s nicest contribution to the series is this: he focuses on the actions of people like Egwene and Nynaeve (and even Tuon), and leaves some of their internal monologuing offscreen, for the reader to fill in.

Short version: I want to read more Wheel of Time. And I think I like this new format.

October 30, 2009 at 3:38 pm 3 comments

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Red Tape

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